I’m not a huge fan of the heat. In fact, when I see pictures on my phone from the time last year, I am shocked I didn’t have a nervous breakdown because the weather was so crazy hot, in the 90s and even one day in the 100s.
In April and early May.
Go home, California. You are drunk.
My body doesn’t handle the heat well. If it’s warm outside, or it’s cool but the heat is turned up inside the building, I have to be really mindful of my temperature. If I start to get too hot, my body is gracious enough to give me warning signs before it enters shut-down mode.
I get light-headed.
I get shaky.
My heart starts racing.
I get extra sweaty. Not I’m-sweaty-because-I’m-hot sweaty, but clammy. It’s a really treat.
I get cranky.
And usually, if I notice that I’m starting to feel any of those things, I can fix it pretty fast. I go into the bathroom and run my hands and wrists under cool water. I grab a soda or some ice from the fridge and rest it on the base of my neck or my pulse points. I turn the fan on, out on a pair of shorts and a tank top, and I rest until feel my body return to normal.
If I don’t catch these things in time, I become physically ill and need to stop what I’m doing and go home. I have left work sick before. I’ve cancelled outings with friends.
It sucks to not thermoregulate well.
The thing is, a part of me weirdly loves the heat in certain contexts. In the summer I almost crave and appreciate it because I expect it and I can plan for it. I know in July that it will be sweltering and I wear the kinds of clothes one wears when it’s hot. I head to the beach or the pool. I love the heat because it brings me those things that I love, like humid summer nights with barbecues and the laughter of friends. The hot summer days turn into warm summer nights with the fire pit set up in the backyard and everyone hanging out until late, talking and laughing and crying and doing life together. Those summer nights mean staying up late when it’s cooler and sleeping later into the day, our skin sticky with sweat.
There’s a beauty in the heat of life if we’re prepared for it. It pushes us past a place where we feel truly comfortable. Sometimes, if we aren’t prepared, it pushes us a little too far and we must lay low while we recover, but for the most part, we can prepare. We can look ahead. We plan. We embrace the heat of hard things because so often the beautiful comes hand-in-hand with it.
We grieve, but we are carried by those who love us.
We stumble, but we reach out to hands helping us back up.
We cry, but we accept the tissues handed to us by friends and strangers alike.
We lose, but we find out that we are stronger than we imagined in our loss.
We hurt, but we are loved well and we heal.
I would rather suffer through a little warmth than miss out on the beauty of living life with others.
– – – – – – – – – –
This post is part of a series leading up to my book launch! Check back here on Tuesday for the next installment. And if you haven’t preordered my book Four Letter Words, you definitely want to do it now as I have a crazy-amazing giveaway going on! For every book you preorder, you will earn an entry to win the items below: three books, a #fangirlyourfriends mug, and a cuff that says We Can Do Hard Things! Check out the goods and then look beneath the picture for the details.
1. You will will receive one entry per book ordered. One book = one entry. Five books = five entires.
2. If you have already preordered, your order automatically enters you! No need to let me know. I have a spreadsheet with orders!
3. You must fill out the preorder form (fill out this form) by 11:59 pm on Sunday, May 8th and submit your payment by 11:59 pm on Tuesday, May 10th.
4. I will draw a winner on Wednesday, May 11th at 9 am!
5. I will be responsible for the extra shipping on top of what you’ll be charged for your book(s) if the prize goes to someone non-local to me.
6. US entries only because overseas postage is so cost-prohibitive.