surprises

I love planning surprises for Charisse, especially when it’s something that she really wants. When she talks about those things, it’s all I can do not to burst and scream “WE HAVE THE BEST SURPRISE PLANNED FOR YOU!” And then seeing her face when she gets that surprise… it is completely worth bottling it up for so long.

I imagine that’s what it’s like for Jesus. All those years ago, when I was crying through hard times and begging him for a family and friends, He was up in Heaven, giddy because He knew:

I HAVE THE BEST SURPRISE FOR YOU.

I am officially 33. It’s weird for me to think about. As I thought about turning 33 , I actually got really teary-eyed thinking about blessed I am and how much God has given me.

It’s often been a hard 33 years, but more often than that… it’s been an amazing 33 years.

He’s given me so many hours and weeks and years of laughter in between the tears. He’s given me a family among the loneliness. He has blessed me with friends when I longed for them.

33 is the year when the fulfillment of one of my greatest dreams is coming true: writing a book. I don’t know this will be a big or a small thing for me and that’s okay because it’s something I am doing for Him, something that He’s made me passionate about.

All these things, they have given me courage.

God has given me roots and now, at 33, I know that He is giving me wings. Wings to fly away from this place and do good, big exciting things for Him. I don’t know what the leaving and flying away looks like or when it will happen, but more than trepidation I feel at the thought of leaving, I feel excitement. I know it’s coming. I know this place will always be my home. I know that my heart will always have a piece here in this soil, in the cities where I’ve been formed and forged, but I also know this:

He has the best surprises for me, and for now I can’t and don’t know those details, but when I do, when I can put the pieces together… what a joy it will be to see it all come into place.

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