I started this post a few days ago when the world seemed so bright and cheery. But today, after all that’s gone on in Boston and Texas the last few days, it just seems like such a hard thing to write such a happy post in the midst of all the darkness.
I keep wanting to stop myself from posting, but what I have to say is still true, regardless of what happened in Texas last night or Boston on Monday. It’s even more true now than then, because what I’ve got to say is that God is real and alive in every sense.
At the Pregnancy Center banquet last month, I decided to write that I could donate $100 within 90 days. As we prayed before we filled out our pledge cards, God made it clear that I wasn’t meant to donate $100.
He told me to make it $250.
My pen hovered over the pledge box as people were filling the cards out. That was — and still is — a lot of money for me. I had uncertainties about my job situation. I was nervous about committing to donating that much money when that much money is essentially my monthly car payment.
But I filled out the card anyhow, knowing that if God told me to donate that much, God would take care of getting me the money.
Monday was my last day at work at the tax firm I was working at. Around 2:30, our boss started walking around giving people their tax bonuses. For about two weeks, I’d wondered if I was going to get one. I could see how they’d give me one, but I could also see as a temp how they wouldn’t.
Well, I got one. And when I opened it, I pretty much just wanted to sit on the groud and sob.
It was a check for $250.
Some might call it coincidence. But I don’t. I can’t. I had no idea that I might get a bonus when God told me to pledge $250. And it wasn’t just a random number I thought of that night. I saw $250 in my mind with SUCH clarity. It wasn’t just a silly number I thought.
We live in a world where horrible, heartbreaking things are happening around us every day. We’ve seen that this week in both Boston and West, Texas. That is the nature of sin. We have all sinned and all fall short of the glory of God. But I will be the first to tell you what I know to be true:
God is in the details.
In those moments of terror, God is there. He hears the cries and pleas of people calling out to Him. I can’t tell you why H doesn’t stop these things from happening, but I can tell you loud and clear that He has greater plans for us than fire and bombs. He is bigger than death and destruction and the sin of this world.
I feel like I have spent so long only sharing Jesus when I felt like it was safe and comfortable and I just can’t do that anymore. I stand for Christ and the power of who He is. He is the one who whispers so clearly to me, “I said $250” and then provides. He is the one who tells me “You are forgiven. Now tell the world” and then gives me the venues to do so.
To deny him would be a terrible mistake. Because He is real, and He is here right now.